Tuesday, February 7, 2012
I love censorship. Seriously, I love that I can have 7 posts started in my blog that I haven't posted because no matter how hard I try they all show what a pessimistic, depressed, Doubting Thomas I am. So- I just keep them private and others are oblivious. (Except for the fact that I am telling you now.) Facebook is the same way, we can show the sides that we want to show of our lives...and keep the junk hidden. Lovely censorship of our thoughts, activities and ideas, so necessary at times.
Anyways, the great thing that I keep learning though, is that as issues arise that strike me with fear, guilt, shame, whatever- God never fails to remind me who I am to HIM. This winter season has brought a lot of ugly with it, but I can't honestly say I would change any of it because it has also brought a lot of learning and wonderful things with it too. I know I am a negative, lying, hypocritical worry wart. This is not news to me...or to most of you. I could walk around hanging my head in shame, but every time I try, God wakes me up with His amazing love and grace. This last week has been a perfect example. When I wake up with the "weight of the world" on my shoulders, and I try to slog through my day with a depressed demeanor- God won't allow it. By the time my head has hit the pillow each night, He has reminded me that He doesn't see me as a sinner, He sees me as His dearly loved daughter. He reminds me that I belong to Him- no matter what. And that "God don't make no junk". What a comfort that is!
God calls us the Apple of His Eye, Precious and Honored, His Polished Arrow, His Children. It is so amazing to be able to cling to those words, and remember that in all things God is working for us, not against us. No matter what our feelings try to tell us.
I have been hanging out in 1 and 2 Corinthians the last few weeks and 1 Corinthians 13 just keeps ringing in my ears. No matter what the circumstances might look like, or how hard it gets- I want to love like this:
"Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things." 1Corinthians 13:4-7
God bless you and keep you, may He make His face shine upon you today... and give you peace.
"If all of life were sunshine,
Our face would long to gain
And feel once more upon it
The cooling splash of rain" Henry Jackson Van Dyke
(Pictures are of what we do every night. Homework, goofing around, being together. It reminds me why we keep on, keepin' on. )