Thanks, Jody! I so needed this!

"Horses are better than husbands or kids. They eat grass, don't smoke or
drink, don't expect an allowance, don't voluntarily get their body parts
pierced, don't hog the remote, don't waste the whole weekend watching
football with their friends, don't talk back to you, don't compare you
unfavorably with their friends' owners, don't keep you awake with their
snoring --- and no horse ever left the toilet seat up after going to the
bathroom."