|(My crew on Jasmine's birthday)|
Sometimes I look around and think there is no possible way we are going to survive. Literally. And then other times I think, life is pretty awesome. How is that? How can I feel such different emotions in the span of a few weeks. Hormones? Perspective? Environment?
|(My grandbaby's first photo. Oh, the pictures we will take!)|
Nothing I go through in a week comes close to a life and death struggle. It's more about driving over 100 miles in a day taking teens to school, to work, and doing my job seeing patients. It's more about being dissatisfied with what kind of mother and wife I think I SHOULD be, when the reality will never measure up. If this dear sister can say in the face of mortality: "Lord, I love you and I trust you", why can't I?
It was just so encouraging to remember this in light of my total "crying-asking to die-moaning-throwing myself on the bathroom floor" freak out. Of course, I found it encouraging AFTER I ate some humble pie and had to apologize to my family and my dog for my ridiculous behavior. It is still to be determined if the dog will forgive me. So now, I am ready to stay the course. Now, I am going to say "I love you. And I trust you. Lord, I love you. And I trust you."
"I trust in God’s unfailing love for ever and ever.
For what you have done I will always praise you in the presence of your faithful people.
And I will hope in your name, for your name is good." Psalm 52:7-9
|(Jasmine and Spencer are always willing to clean and help out. They make a good team.)|