"But this is your hour- when darkness reigns."

Tomorrow will be a day of celebrating and laughing, a time of family and friends and giving thanks for the ultimate gift of salvation. Some people won't think much of it, some will be brought to their knees in gratitude.

Easter Sunday. So important...but not by itself.

Without Good Friday, Easter Sunday would never have come. To have the city praising him and waving palm branches just a week ago, to Luke 22 and after...shame. That's what I feel. I know my fickleness could have lead me to be one of those in the crowd- a shouting, angry face.

We had the chance to attend a Good Friday Service this year, and as I listened to the accounts of Jesus' last earthly moments, the scripture reading and the medical accounts of His scourging and death, I kept thinking of something I read this week about grace. I have been doing a study by Kay Arthur, and she says throughout that when we are faced with our own sin, when we are ready to confess...we can choose to run to Mount Sinai, or we can run to Mount Calvary.

It's such a tangible idea, to run in one direction or the other. Both towards God, but with very different results.

The author said:
"Remember, it was at Calvary that God inaugurated the covenant of grace as He put to death His Son, the covenant Lamb.
Sinai was the mountain on which the Law was inaugurated as Moses "took the blood of the calves and the goats...saying "THIS IS THE BLOOD OF THE COVENANT WHICH GOD COMMANDED YOU TO KEEP". (Hebrews 9:19-20)
To run to Sinai is to try in some way to do penance for your sins, to do some sort of good deed to make up for failing God."

But grace..."grace is found at Calvary".(chapter 6 of "Lord, I Need Grace...")

Oh, how wonderful is that? We keep striving to BE better, to DO better, to try harder to stop being insufficient and weak...when, we will always be completely unable to satisfy the perfection God requires. Until we fall under the sacrifice and forgiveness of Jesus.

Wonderful, wonderful. This weekend is a sad time when you realize what it cost. But it is also the most freeing weekend of the year really, when we choose to embrace all that it stands for.

The pastor said at the beginning of the service to think on what the "Grave" means to us personally. The grave of Christ...and at the end He asked people to just shout out their thoughts. To hear older adults speaking of "grace" and "mercy", young little voices shouting out "forgiveness" and "joy".
I had thought of the word "love" when I pictured Jesus' grave, but as I listened...it was just impossible to see any one word or phrase that could possibly define it.

And that's what is so great about God's sacrifice- it's bigger, and better, and more complete than we can ever really understand. Thank you, Father. Thank you for being so much more than we can imagine.

Happy Easter, Friends. Enjoy your eggs and candy and family, while you lift your hands in praise to the One who gave you everything.
"If we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness." 1John 1:8-9

If you need someone to celebrate Easter with and are local, Thomas Jefferson Middle School will be the place to be at 10 AM Sunday. Be there and worship with us!
3000 NW 119th St, Vancouver, WA 9868

(Pics are just for fun- the last few weeks have been full of landscaping and gardening, of love and friendship. Hard things that break our hearts, good things that remind us tomorrow is a new day, and Jesus with us through it all.)

To be a turtle on a log is a wonderful thing....

Could Friday have been any more beautiful? I love that I was able to adjust the work day and go sit in the sunshine watching the horses graze for awhile. It made me wish I was a turtle...have you ever noticed that the minute the sun comes out, all these turtles you never knew were in a pond suddenly are lined up in rows on every log they can find- just SOAKING up the rays. What a life they lead!

After my "baking time" in the sun I had to resume real life. And to be honest, it was a tough afternoon. Sometimes the fight and the struggle just feels like it is winning and "Why bother" comes to mind.

The greatest thing though, God gets that. He knew I was discouraged and tired and feeling just a little hopeless. And so he gave me Good Friday. When I took a minute to reflect on all that was "good" about this Friday 2000 years ago, suddenly the world really did look brighter. The best thing I heard at the service I was attending comforted my heart so much...praise You, Lord for always being ENOUGH. Oh, how I love you!

"Your service may please God,
Your worship may exalt Him,
Your study can reveal God,
BUT,
You need never aspire to SATISFY God
because He is completely satisfied in the
work of His Son."

Sunday's Comin'! Woot Woot! The flowers are trying to bloom, the sun is shining, and God is GLORIOUS. It just doesn't get any better...Happy Easter, friend.

Living in between...

Good Friday. Strange name, but in reality so true, yes? Easter Sunday. We all know what that day is too. But what about "Holy Saturday"? An article I read describes all the days of Easter Holy Week pretty well, looking at it from both Protestant and Catholic angles. In summary, "However it is observed, Holy Saturday has traditionally been a time of reflection and waiting, the time of weeping that lasts for the night while awaiting the joy that comes in the morning." (http://www.crivoice.org/cyholyweek.html)

Where am I going with this? You see,I hang out in the Old Testament a lot. Is it because I like stories? Possibly. Is it because the amazing histories crack me up sometimes and let my imagination run wild at other times? Maybe. Is it because a God of justice and ferocity makes more sense to my legalistic mind than a God who loves a goomba like me and saved me...with nothing I can do to earn it? Probably. Grace is something God is constantly trying to get through my thick skull. Good Friday (even though it should be celebrated on Wednesday- but that's another rant. :) makes sense to me. Mourn your own stupidity, your own sin. Wallow in your grief over killing the One True God. Spend Saturday reflecting on what an epic failure you are, and look towards Sunday- when it all makes sense and you are supposedly FREE! Reborn! Made Alive with Christ! Not what God intended I know, but all things many of us do, or feel.

But this week I heard someone say something so clearly...In a discussion about the Holy Days of Good Friday, Holy Saturday and Easter Sunday, this preacher said "Most Christians are stuck living in between. They live in Holy Saturday their whole Christian lives...somewhere after they confessed their sins and were saved (Good Friday) but never reaching Sunday- and all that resurrection and LIFE means." Did I ever think of it that way? That I live in the "Saturday"...reflecting and mourning the losses and WAITING for the new life Jesus gives every single one of us? Living like a dead person waiting for heaven, instead of realizing I am resurrected already? I can't explain it right, but WOW. God has been so amazingly good to me this year. He has been loving me gently, and pushing me to stop trying to EARN my life back. For the first time in my Christian life, I haven't felt total regret and sorrow when I look at Easter. When I cry over Good Friday, and remember my Lord and all that He did for me, for the first time- it is with tears of repentance and JOY. I don't feel like wasting my Saturday being all forlorn over my sins- they've been FORGIVEN. I am choosing...now and ever more... to live in the CELEBRATION of Easter. The day Jesus did all the rest to get me to. Oh, Hallelujah for that!

Am I still a goomba? Yes, unfortunately. I will always mess up and forget the things I most hold dear. But I can confess it and MOVE FORWARD. God has given me a complete picture of Himself through His Word, through Jesus...and every time I hold that treasure in my hands and dig into His nature, I can be sure that He doesn't want me "living in between". He doesn't want me hanging out in Good Friday or Holy Saturday. He wants me free to run, dance, and LIVE with Him in Resurrection Sunday. That was the whole point. And what a fantastic point He made, yes?

Happy Holy Saturday, friends. Father, help us to remember to live like You want us to. I am so praying that you have been "living in between" sometimes too, that today is the day you move forward. God bless you with more of Himself! xoxox

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a LIVING HOPE through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade—kept in heaven for you,who through faith are shielded by God's power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time...Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls." 1 Peter 1:3-9

(We took a trip to Seaside for Spring Break, had to share a photo of my sweeties at Fort Stevens. I pray these guys learn about grace and understand it a lot faster than I am. :)

It's only Friday- Sunday's comin...

(Don't forget to pause the music on the right so you can hear the video!)

Good Friday- I always felt like, "what's good about it?" When I think about it, it makes me cry. Then I feel guilty rather than relieved, and I remember what a loser I am. This Good Friday, I finally got it. Yes, it still makes me cry, yes, I still feel like a loser, and yes- I remember. I remember all the ugliness of me, the sins I keep secret, the unfaithfulness I practice more often than I should. But this Good Friday, I finally realized- "Sunday is coming." Thank you, God- that you promise I will be perfect- resurrected into your beautiful kingdom free of sin and wickedness!