"If depression and oppression visit me, I am to blame; god is not, nor is anyone else. Dejection springs from one of two sources- I have either satisfied a lust or I have not; lust means- I must have it at once. Spiritual lust makes me demand an answer from God, instead of seeking God Who gives the answer." Oswald Chambers
Wow- so not what I wanted to read. But more true than most of us would like to admit. This brought me back to a conversation I had with a friend and family member awhile back, he called me on the carpet for my sour attitude and my constant whining about what I couldn't have, and this idea of the "source of dejection" was exactly what he was getting at. Yeah, didn't take his comments so hot then, but I definitely think God used him to smack me around a little and get me to wake up to what I was doing. If I chose to pine away for things I don't have- currently wishing for things to be the way they were two years ago- I have no right to blame God, or say "why me, Lord". God had blessed me abundantly, and when things aren't going the way I like, it's usually because I am not GOING the way God would like me to go. This is definitely a tough one for me, but one I feel that God keeps bringing in front of me- I have to check my attitude at the door before my feet hit the floor each morning so that I can be effective and truly full of joy the rest of the day. Ahhhh- what a freeing thought that I can, and do, have some control over my attitude and response. Thank you, Lord, for your wisdom, and your faithfulness to not leave me where I am at. You love me to much too let me be a stinker. :)
Side note- I looked up the definition of "dejection" to see if it would provide some insight- and I would say I pick the first definition:
- The state of being dejected; low spirits.
- Evacuation of the intestinal tract; defecation (hehehehe- immature grin on my face- way too many memories of little old men and their poop factories making my workday miserable)